'Sorry for the things I say when I'm hangry'

Bodge's Diet Blog

'Sorry for the things I say when I'm hangry'

*UPDATE Tuesday 5:10pm*

Super happy today. I literally had free reign to eat what I'd normally eat. The diet means i only have to restrict my intake for 2 days in the week. That being said, I've eaten nothing but boiled chicken and sweet potato in an attempt to not ruin yesterdays good work.

In reflection, I've been pretty grumpy. Not gonna lie. It was not a good day yesterday. i think I scrunched up a piece of paper excessively hard. However, all good now. FOOOOOOOOD.

I don't think this is a sustainable diet for me. I can smell baked goods and chocolate where there aren't any. that's not a good sign.

Monday total calorie intake: 515 calories.


*UPDATE Monday 6:45pm*

Finished my show for the afternoon, but there's some mad storm action. Can't see myself going to the car just yet. Not while it's bucketing down.

I'll stay safe indoors with this big charity lolly box. 

One lolly can't hurt, right?


*UPDATE Monday 4:30pm*

It's been a while since my tiny bowl of oats and blueberries. I'm already trying to screw the system over. The idea of this diet is to restrict myself to 500 calories for 2 of the 7 days of the week. I've already tried to find ways around the calorie limit. I just googled 'Can i buy more calories from doing a sit up?' - The jury is still out on that one.


Other things I've googled since starting this diet:

- How many calories in a Weet-Bick (Also then had to check if Weet-Bix was plural of Weet-Bick)

- Can i die from lack of junk food if i go off it cold turkey

- How long into the Five-Two diet before I lose weight


I also assumed water loading was where you drink so much water that you are too full to eat. Turns out that wasn't a thing. It was just a thing on the first season of The Biggest Loser Australia, where some contestants loaded up on water to try and trick the scales or something.

Like I say, I'm not a doctor.


Monday 6/11/17 3:20pm

I’m doing daily entries this week while I attempt the Five Two diet. The Five Two diet is this: Two days in the week, I’ll restrict myself to taking in only 500 calories. The other 5 days, will be more or less normal eating habits.

 Me in 2015, when burgers were life.

So, why am I doing this? Basically it boils down to some pretty simple facts about me; I don’t like exercising or eating overly healthy on a daily basis and thought this was the easiest way to trim some fat. I’m expecting changes in my behavioural patterns over the course of the week. I’m already noticing that I’m becoming irritated with spell-check as I type. Not entirely uncommon, for me. The added bonus of being on restricted calories today has made me less tolerant.

This morning I’ve had 1 cup of oats, accompanied only by 50g of blueberries and a drizzle of honey. Oh, and a black coffee. CAN’T forget my black coffee. It’s not all bad news, though… I can eat again at dinner time.

I won't lie, the urge to just WALK past the bakery for a sniff of baked goodness is almost overwhelming.

I’m going to do rolling updates throughout the week, unless I get so angry from lack of sugary snacks and bakery-pie-goodness that I decide to throw the computer out the window.

Sorry in advance for any rants and tirades of verbal abuse that get thrown about while I’m 'hangry'.