Howie's Son's Foolproof Plan To Fix Collingwood

Always Try And Wear Footy Boots

Howie's Son's Foolproof Plan To Fix Collingwood

The infamous ‘Big Penguin’, son of MMM Winter Breakfast host Mark Howard, has a foolproof plan to improve the stumbling season of the Collingwood Magpies.


Nathan Buckley's team are currently lingering at 14th on the ladder with a 5-9 record, seemingly needing all the help they can get.


Up steps The Big Penguin to lend a helping hand.


The footballing guru’s plan to fix the Pies was an exclusive on this morning’s show, with the die-hard Hawks fan only happy to help out an opposing team. 


The Penguins plan is this: 


  • Not give it to the other team
  • Not let ‘them’ get the ball
  • Not let ‘them’ touch it
  • Always try and wear footy boots
  • When the drink carriers come out, always get a drink
  • When it’s half time, or something, go to the loo and have a wee or a poo




Hopefully Bucks was listening because this feedback is absolutely genius: hold onto the footy, remember to wear your boots, keep hydrated, and have a wee or a poo at halftime (or whenever).


The four-point plan has even received a glowing review from comedian and avid footy fan Will Anderson






If they take that advice into their weekend match-up against Essendon, the Pies might just turn their season around!