It wasn’t exactly a classic at the G for the Boxing Day Test, but it’s fair to say the only thing better than Alastair Cook’s brilliant double ton was our commentary.
We understand that you can’t listen to every minute of all five days, so we’ve collated the best gags, one-liners and mini-stories from the MCG Test.
Skull on Davey Warner’s day five dismissal
“Every time he sees Joe Root he’s gotta have a swing at him!”
Mick after Swanny’s cab driver didn’t know where the MCG is
“That’s would like being in Egypt and saying ‘pyramids’ and him not knowing where to go!”
JB on Jimmy Anderson
“He takes an hour to walk from wherever he’s fielding… he looks 100!”
Mick on Isa and Neroli when Hugh Jackman came in
“It’s like seagulls squabbling over a chip up there!”
JB on Pat Cummins’ day two illness
“This is AB style captaincy… unless you’re actually clinically dead, do the job you’re selected to do!”
Skull on Warnie at the AIS
“He was about 85 hamburgers over par… somebody’s come up to me and said ‘this is the next big thing’, I said ‘what, for Black Rock RSL?’”
Merv on the Barmy Army giving a signed shirt to a cop
“If the Barmy Army gave me a shirt like that signed by all of em, I would wipe my arse on it!”
Mick on Jonny Bairstow
“England’s second favourite ranga… after Prince Harry!”
Swanny on cricket security guards
“Is there an official school especially for security at cricket… do you ever drink and have a laugh? Do you have any mates? No? Perfect!”
JB and Greg Blewett hang it on Merv’s slower ball
“That stupid thing you bowled was like a leg spinner… a fast bowler bowling a leggie. Who woulda thought?”
Swanny on the time he was sledged by an ump
“As I walked out to bat he’s shouted over to me… ‘Oi Swanny, that diary, do you write it yourself?’ I said ‘yeah I do Pete’.
“He said ‘it’s shite’!”
Merv on Tom Curran
“He’s got the run up of Jason Gillespie… he’s got the looks of Alan Donald and he’s got the pace of Tim May”
Merv on the MCC Committee Room
“It’s probably THE nicest place to have a piss in the world!”
Mick on the butterfly that stopped play
“Probably come out of his wallet if I know the Poms!”
To keep up to date with the best gags as they happen, make sure you download the Triple M app and listen to the catch up podcast every day!