David Kidwell believes Jason Taumalolo has disrespected him by not telling him in person he wanted to play for Tonga at the upcoming World Cup.
"The issue I have is I would have liked Jason to tell me to my face," Kidwell told the Courier Mail.
"I can understand why he wanted to play for Tonga and represent his heritage but I just wished he showed me some respect.
"I found out that he wanted to play for Tonga from a third party. He never told me - I still haven't heard from him or spoken to him.
"I'm not going to have any ill-feeling towards Jason but if he explained things to me, I would have at least sat down and said, 'OK, what are your reasons?'.
Kidwell also told the Courier Mail it won't be up to him or the selectors but ultimately the players will decide if Taumalolo plays for New Zealand again.
"It won't be up to me whether Jason plays for New Zealand again. It won't be the selectors either," he said.
"It will be players. I'm trying to shape our culture at the moment and they are the ones driving it."