22 Funniest 12th Man Quotes

What a list. Marvellous effort that.

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A sad day for comedy and sport in this country following news that Billy Birmingham has retired The 12th Man.

So here are 22, or is that "Twenty-chew", of his greatest moments... Marvellous effort that.



TONY: Ohrrrrr, blow it out your awse Bill.


RICHIE: Security, if Max Walker comes within 10 feet of this f*cking door shoot him ok?

SECURITY: Yes Mr Benaud.


BILL: It’s a great day for Australia and it's a great day for Victoria, a great day for the world.


BILL: It's all happening here, the tension, the drama, the buzz, the atmosphere.


MRS BENAUD: The cream, the bone, the white, the off-white, the ivory or the beige.


YOUNG KID: Hey, Richie, how bout an autograph?


TONY: I remember when I shared a room with Immy... he cracked one through the covers. Let me tell you that hotel bed of his blew up into something resembling one of those huge Pakistani marquees.


RICHIE: Ha ha! Super piece of writing that. Really funny stuff.


TONY: Bill shut the f*ck up or the pigeon gets it


TONY: I’m warning you Bill, if that pigeon craps on my scorecard…


SOCCER COMMENTATOR: Passes to the substitute Smith, I hope I've pronounced that correctly.


RICHIE: Amir Sohail.
BILL: Hail Ritchie, hail the great man, haiiilll!


BILL LAWRY: I love him, I want to boof him. Get him up here.


RICHIE ON THE HI-5: Just a bit of Seppo bullshit the West Indies introduced.


MAX WALKER: Go Silver Sovereign, Gooooo Silver Sovereign.


TONY: Well for starters, you can have the bastard barred from this part of the broadcast area.


BEAR: Thanks very Max muchy good afternoon to you and to everyone.


TONY: The most guts he's shown have been hanging out of that skin tight Aussie shirt of his.
BILL: I'll let him know you said that Tony


BILL: Got him! Yes.. Piss Off. He’s Out.


RICHIE: Sorry, mate it’s a private function


BILL: Grahemey Labroy? His name's Graham, Max.

MAX: Yes, well. All his team mates have such long and complicated names. Seems a shame for this young man to miss out. I think I'll just go on calling him Grahemy. 

BILL: Gee, You’re f*cked in the head sometimes Max.


TONY: To me a grudge is nothing more than a place to pork your cor.


MRS BENAUD: Welcome back to the kitchen love.

RICHIE: Thanks darl. Marvelous to be joining you in the kitchen, for the first time today.


BILL: Canary yellow? That's Australian gold my friend and don't you f*ckin’ forget it! Canary yellow indeed...

12 December 2016

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Pub Talk

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