New Zealand-born Russell Crowe has declared that it would be "practical" to merge his place of birth with Australia in a move that would definitely, 100 per cent not annoy everyone who still argues about where pavlova was invented.
The Gladiator actor made the bold statement in the wake of New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern's much-lauded appearance at the UN, insisting that he wasn't trying to be "controversial".
"Look... just accept it," Crowe tweeted. "She's awesome. Is it time to make Australia and New Zealand into one country with @JacindaArdern as PM?
"Not trying to be controversial... just practical."
To be fair, it would be nice to enjoy a stable government for a while.
Unfortunately, Crowe's ingenious solution was shot down almost immediately by a number of Kiwis, including one who told Crowe that he would need to "sort your mess before you're allowed with the in-crowd".
Fine. We didn't want to be "the West Island" anyway.